Complicity and Mediocrity

The TWO things I fear.

Complicity.

Mediocrity.

While reading "Start Something That Matters" I had to face many personal questions.

What do I stand for?

What are my ultimate life goals?

What's stopping me from achieving them?

I'll be the first to say, I have accomplished a lot in my short time here on earth.

I've met many of my career and personal goals, some being....

- Graduating nursing school at 21.

- Moving out on my own shortly after.

- Traveling to Europe on my own (and made it home alive) twice.

- Receiving my BSN last February.

- Helping open the cancer center of my career dreams a few months ago.

So why do I still feel so void?

I'm just now scratching the surface of the answer to that question.

Complicity and mediocrity.

In my hearts of heart I know I'm not meant to be a floor nurse.

I hate the routine, I hate the structure, I hate the hours

But I know I was born to help people!

Don't get me wrong, nursing was a fine start to a fulfilling life of helping others.

BUT it doesn't completely fill my heart up to the tippy top.

I still walk away from the hospital every morning feeling like something is missing.

I want to leave Arizona and find my true calling, so what's stopping me?

COMPLICITY

I've complied to a life that may come across very fulfilling to others and that has suited me well until NOW.

Before I would get anxiety over taking drastic changes in my life.

Jumping with eyes closed.

Leaving the known for the unknown

for fear of failure.

Why?

Because we are wired that way! Fight or flight.


Our ancestor used this once during times in which a wrong turn mean life or death. Aiming an arrow wrong meant not having dinner that night.

The hormones released back then over life and death situations are still being released today among all of us during times of fearfulness.

It's an exaggerated response.
And when we feed into it we become complacent.

Leading us to live a life of mediocrity.

That, my friends, is dangerous state to live in.

Learn to FIGHT.

Not flight

You have to overcome those instinctual feelings of fear.
(To learn more about this I suggest reading Buddha's Brain: the practical neuroscience of happiness, love, and wisdom By Rick Hanson)

Do you have dreams?

Stop dreaming them, DO THEM.

"Someday is a disease that will take your dreams to the grave....."

Leaving Arizona for Africa on a medical mission gives me a bit of anxiety, but when I woke up and decided to take a leap a faith I vowed to not live a life of complicity.

I will start with AFRICA.

How will you start?